Free Fall : Renaissance – Chapter 3
Here is the third chapter of my sequel to the movie Free Fall / Freier Fall ! I hope you’ll like it ! An unexpected event awaits Marc and it risks to change his daily life.
I feel soft hands go back along my hips, fondle my back, then embrace me. I turn over and contemplate the China seas colored eyes of Kay. He addresses me his angelic smile he does so well. I smile back at him and approach my face close to his. I kiss him passionately. He puts his hands on my cheeks. I hold them tight, as if I never wanted to let them go. He lays a soft kiss on the lobe of my left ear. I succumb to his call. I take him in my arms. The warmth of his naked body heats up mine.
He lays his head on my shoulder. I gently kiss his forehead. Our clinch lasts a few minutes, but I feel like I lose all notion of time. I wish I could stay with Kay in this peaceful sphere for eternity.
Suddenly, Kay lifts his head and looks at me with his mischievous yet innocent air. His sweet voice brushes my ears :
– Have you ever thought of leaving somewhere ? Starting over ?
I stare at him with a slight doubt.
– But this is what I did, no ?
– Why are we not together then Marc ? Where are you ? Come find me. Don’t leave me alone in darkness.
I wake up abruptly, covered with sweat. I breathe with difficulty.
– Kay … ? Kay !!! I scream while checking the sheets next to me.
I realize I’m just coming out of a dream only after a few seconds. It looked so real. Why have I awoken ? I would have preferred to stay in my dream with Kay over and over again. I cannot control myself any longer, so I crack up. Tears begin to soak my cheeks.
– Kay … I babble while crying.
I check my bed once again, in a crazy hope that Kay was really present. But there is nothing and no one. Only the void left by Kay.
– Shit ! I yell while throwing my pillow across the room.
From that moment on, it is clearly impossible for me to get back to sleep. This soft but hard dream haunts my mind. I give a look at my alarm clock : it is 3.50am. As I turn round and round since ten minutes, I decide to quickly put sport trousers and a hoodie. I grab a towel and my swimsuit that I stuff in a bag, then leave my apartment. I cross as discreetly as I can the courtyard to finally join the large building where the training swimming pool is located.
It is normally forbidden to go there during the night, but at this hour, there is no risk for me to be caught. I get undressed, put on my swimsuit, then slowly dive in the tepid water. It makes me feel great. I feel my muscles relax, loosen themselves. I take a deep breath and swim some laps. Finally, I decide to simply lie on my back in the water, as if I was stretched out on my bed, and let myself drift away by the flow. My ears are plunged in the water and I hear nothing except the aquatic sounds. There is only serenity left. I close my eyes. I think back at the time where Kay and I had fooled around in the swimming pool. Just after our reprimand by Werner Brandt. That was really the moment where we had started to become friends. Good old Kay. Always ready to break the rules. He never gave a fuck to be caught or about what people could have told him. He knew how to spice up his life, be carefree, open his heart wide. My exact opposite. Nothing like me. I think this is the reason why he attracted me straight from the beginning.
I melt into those peaceful thoughts and let myself go in the course of water. I ignore how long I stay like this, but after a while I decide to go back to the apartment before risking getting caught. Some officers arrive quite early at the barracks. I get out of the swimming pool, dry myself, put my clothes on and return to my place.
Until the early morning, I read a book and watch TV. At about 9.15am, I go to the barracks to go on my mission. Today, we cover the event from yesterday once again. Everything goes well.
At the end of the afternoon, while we are about to come back, we receive an emergency call from the command post announcing that a riot has started in the heated suburb of a nearby town. We are all requisitioned, as well as other units close from the place, in order to intervene quickly.
– Shit, hurls Matthias on an ironic tone. Me who thought of coming back quietly tonight !
– Shut up, Pfeiffer, fulminates Werner Brandt. Content yourself to follow the orders !
I inwardly curse this last minute mission, because Bettina fixed our appointment tonight, and I’ve let my cell phone at the barracks. Impossible to tell her my plans have changed.
– Scheisse, I whisper in silence.
On site, this is chaos. Apparently, a large group of troublemakers has decided to confront the police. We need a few hours to restore calm. At one point, lost in my thoughts, I don’t notice a young man rushing at me with a baseball bat in hand. I receive a blow on my right shoulder. I return myself instantly only to see the bat being aimed at my face. Fortunately, Matthias arrives just in time to throw himself onto the maniac, blocking him on the ground then handcuffing him.
– Thanks … I murmur to Matthias.
– What’s happening to you dude ?! Pull yourself together, we are not taking a stroll !
When the mission finally ends and we are back, it is around 11.30pm. I rush out of the anti-riot truck then run in all haste to the locker room where I undress my equipment. I don’t take any shower and hurry to my Golf.
I arrive at the house around midnight. I ring at the door but no one answers. Yet I see light through the pane. I mechanically open the door.
– Bettina ? I shout.
No answer. When I penetrate in the living room, I discover Max in his pram, which looks all ready, as if it was about to be taken away. A bag filled with clothes lies just beside. I give a quick glance in all the rooms, but there is no sign of Bettina. I come back to Max who is starting to writhe and take him in my arms.
– Hey baby. Shh. There.
I cradle him a few moments, kiss him, and then replace him in the pram. While doing this, I discover an envelope from Bettina on the couch. I grab it and find a letter inside :
– “Marc … I cannot continue like this. I tried to resist as hard as I could, to hold on, but I have reached my limits. I love Max with all my heart, but with our separation something has broken. Max is our son. I wanted us to raise him together. I had so many dreams. And they have all collapsed. I’m not going to hold forth … I leave Max in your care. I am not able to raise a child who will never have a father at this side. I am sorry, Marc. This was not the idea I had of family. I can’t stand to be alone with him. Don’t try to make me change my mind. Don’t wait for me. I will not be back until several days. I hope you’ll understand. Bettina.”
– Fuck ! I scream while throwing the letter across the room.
How could she do this to me ? I feel the anger invading me. Of course, I would be the happiest of fathers if I could have Max, but I live in barracks, in a small apartment. Is it really a proper place to raise a child ? Has she thought about all this ?
I hear Max starting to cry. I take him in my arms to comfort him. He calms down little by little. Tears also start to spread on my cheeks.
– Don’t worry little guy, daddy’s always gonna be there for you. I will never abandon you, I whisper to his ear.
I grab the envelop left by Bettina once again and discover a wad of bills accompanied by a little note : “Marc, here is all the money you sent me since our break-up, and some more. I never used it. I hope it will help you. Bettina.”. Does she really think that money will resolve everything ? It will help, but won’t fix everything.
I have nothing left to do here. I put Max back in his pram. I go from room to room in order to close the lights and shutters. When I come back to Max, he has peacefully fallen asleep. I take his pram as well as several boxes of milk powder and baby’s bottles. Finally, I lock the house and walk a few steps.
I give a last glance at the house then look Max, and for the first time in many months, by observing him, my face illuminates itself. I don’t know why, but I have the feeling that a new life awaits me. Move forward, never turn back again.